http://www.happierabroad.com/ebook/Page94.htm
The pros and cons of Filipino characteristics
Here are some fascinating observations of the Philippines based on my experiences as well as those of other intellectual expats and foreigners here.
- It’s a culture of denial. When lies or dark secrets are discovered, they simply act as though it doesn’t exist. For instance, when you catch a Filipino or Filipina in a lie, they don’t try to explain it, acknowledge it, or even apologize for it. They simply act like it doesn’t exist and refuse to discuss it. Likewise, when you ask them to reconcile a contradiction or discrepancy in their story, they often don’t bother and if you insist on it, demanding “Just tell me the truth!” it usually falls on deaf ears. Or when you catch them in an embarrassing blunder, such as when a store clerk tells you “We don’t have that, sir” and then two seconds later you see it behind them and point to it saying “Well isn’t that it?” (which happens very often here), they don’t apologize or acknowledge their error. And if you then ask “Why did you tell me you didn’t have it when you did?” to try to force them to acknowledge their mistake, it will certainly fall on deaf ears, no matter how many times you repeat the question. It’s their way of “saving face”.
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- One refreshing thing I’ve noticed is that they do not generally judge, analyze, criticize, compare, or complain. It’s not in their nature to do so. And that’s nice in the sense that they aren’t usually going to judge or criticize you. But on the flip side, this also means that they also lack the ability to analyze, think and reason as we understand it, so communication with them can often be frustrating. And giving them lectures in logic or on being fair and considerate by Western standards, often feels futile. They aren’t as exacting as we are. In fact, asking them for explanations often results in silence as if they don’t hear you or their brain stalls. It’s as if asking for explanations “freezes up” their mind. They simply don’t like to think of “explanations” or “reasons” or even to question things. It’s definitely not an “intellectual culture” or even an organized one. Since they do not generally complain here (at least the way Americans do), services and processes don’t usually improve. It’s a non-confrontational culture.
Whereas Western countries are advanced economically, the Philippines is much more advanced socially. Although its economic infrastructure is weak in comparison, socially it is far more evolved, advanced and more integrated than in the West. No one is perpetually lonely, friendless or dateless here.
Thus, as in all things, there are pros and cons to the Filipino ways, culture, mentality, and behaviors. But as for me of course, the bottom line is that my love life here and the women here, are a TRILLION times better than in the States. Here I have a CHOICE among beautiful women, thus giving me a sense of WORTH and VALUE. To men like me, that’s what matters the most. And that’s why we put up with all the annoyances here.
- “One more local trait- they do not like to apologize, you are supposed to sulk at them for a few hours to a few weeks depending on the offence and then you are supposed to forget it as if nothing has happened. They will do the same to you. You will be amazed at what offences they forgive and forget. When you start mentioning some past misdemeanors, they will shrug and say- ‘but it is all in the past’. These past offenses only resurface when they are drunk.”
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