Quote:
Originally Posted by Qwerty6969
I have spoken to him about the lack of sex. But he just shrugs it off and not talk about it anymore and just go about our daily life. And due to young children I don't think divorce is an option
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Maybe you should try couples counseling if you still see a future with him. Problems like these aren't going to go away, and the longer problems go without resolution, the more problems will arise.
长痛不如短痛.
The best time to divorce is without kids. The next best time is when they are too young to blame themselves. Somebody I used to talk to shared her story with me, and it made me question everything about my own marriage, which I'd been questioning for some time already, but her situation crystallized everything for me.
Anyway back to being friends with him programming ...
I don't entirely with frozen in that I do believe exes can be good friends, or even best friends.
But that can happen only after enough time has passed, enough water flowed under the bridge and both parties have long since moved on.
But I do agree with him in that what you seek is likely impossible, that you and he can go straight from being lovers to being good friends.
Also, ask yourself honestly why you want that. Keep him on as a back up? Somebody whose arms you can easily run back into?
If not, then really you know the answer is obvious. Everybody can see it, you have to cut him off.
Angsting seems fun in a weird sado masochistic and even cathartic sort of way, but a poor basis for a quality existence.