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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #76  
Old 28-09-2012, 03:46 AM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by kengohchien;

i suppose we are a bit more ''stable'' now that we've been meeting up more. like i said, i know what i should do, but stupidly, i'm not doing it.

i guess it is also me. i have low self-esteem and sometimes i just feel so lousy i think i should be grateful someone wants to shag me. yet on occasion i have been told that i'm pretty.

Sigh. i am still leaving but have not tendered. and sometimes with the uncertainty in life, sometimes you just want to throw caution to the winds. or maybe it's wise to just stop thinking so much and just enjoy whatever or what it's worth. but to shut off the part of me which thinks and rationalizes - would i still be me?

so thanks for reading thus far, i am one confused girl. thanks to those who say i sound like a nice girl. nice to hear that, heh.
This is a game when there could only be 1 winner, the one who put in feelings lose. Anyway it's also a matter of time that that it will end. Rule no 1 for FB, enjoy n F off.

if u can't keep to the rule, don't indulge in one. It will only worsen your self esteem n make you feel disappointed at yourself, u know that u luv the person but he could never be yours to keep. Worse is he's only using your feelings to toy you.

Anyway its hard to stay rational when u r inside it. U r just blinded by the false sense of happiness, the roller coaster feeling is just an illusion. What I can say is to pull away, distance before u lose control of yourself. Are u able to take it if he end the r/s? It will be the best for u to mentally prepare urself for it before u really get hurts. It will be disastrous if one gets desperate n do all sort of silly stuff to hang onto a r/s.

Lastly, it's pointless to find another man to spite him especially for a mature man like him who seen it all. It's not worth it. Men like him control their emotions very well, in fact they can just change overnight. Even if you leave, he can easily find another 1 to replace u.

U can never guess what's going in his mind. Luv yourself more . A woman who luv herself don't need a Fb to be happy n fill up the void in ur life. Find someone who geninuely loves u for who u are.

Last edited by sane; 28-09-2012 at 04:16 AM.
  #77  
Old 28-09-2012, 10:53 AM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

It's always hard to maintain a fb relationship "if" you're not game enough. My advise is let go and move on. If not, You will end up hurting yourself

Last edited by als0n; 28-09-2012 at 10:55 AM. Reason: Adding words
  #78  
Old 28-09-2012, 11:04 AM
XiaoBaiChye XiaoBaiChye is offline
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

thanks.. it has been enlightening to read this thread...

cant comprehend how FB can even works... if one can ever hv feelings cos personally i think only when feelings are involved then sex will follow
  #79  
Old 28-09-2012, 12:07 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by XiaoBaiChye View Post
thanks.. it has been enlightening to read this thread...

cant comprehend how FB can even works... if one can ever hv feelings cos personally i think only when feelings are involved then sex will follow
Yes true...but for FB...the feeling is not (or should not be) the...ohhh, I want to share my life with this person, build a home, get a pet, grow a garden, paint a fence and raise children type of feeling...

It is more of a....ohhhh this person is so hot, makes me feel so sexy, gives me so much pleasure that I so love to smell, taste, feel, hold this person and make love till I cannot make love any more type of feeling...

Still feelings but not exactly the same compartment...

For the TS and most people...it's with great sex then the feeling will follow.

To make FB work...share and enjoy the physical (body) but safeguard the emotional (heart).
  #80  
Old 28-09-2012, 01:07 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

Like to ask gers n guys here a qns.

when a couple is in a FB relationship, why the ger shd feels that she is been use as a sex object? why not the other way round that the guy feels he is being the sex object?

After both are looking for sex isnt it?

Typical i wanna hv my cake n eat it too?........talk abt equality!
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  #81  
Old 28-09-2012, 01:11 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

me and my fb are friends.
I don't regard them as meat, i spend time with her and just txt her thru whatsapp.

Sometime we just meet and share our juicy stories of the people we hooked up with..
If its just sex sex sex.. then it's boring..
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  #82  
Old 28-09-2012, 02:06 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

TS ask how to make FB fall for him, I would love a thread that says 'how to make or prevent FB NOT to fall for me'..............LOL
  #83  
Old 28-09-2012, 02:14 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

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Originally Posted by cocobun View Post
I would love a thread that says 'how to make or prevent FB NOT to fall for me'..............LOL
You too yandao already. There is no hope for you in this aspect.
  #84  
Old 28-09-2012, 02:19 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

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Originally Posted by Reoxy View Post
You too yandao already. There is no hope for you in this aspect.
Don't rub salt on my wound lah.....pour some honey can??
  #85  
Old 28-09-2012, 02:23 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

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Originally Posted by cocobun View Post
Don't rub salt on my wound lah.....pour some honey can??
You can try to do them raw and then tell them a week later you have HIV...
  #86  
Old 28-09-2012, 02:25 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by BoinKING View Post
me and my fb are friends.
I don't regard them as meat, i spend time with her and just txt her thru whatsapp.

Sometime we just meet and share our juicy stories of the people we hooked up with..
If its just sex sex sex.. then it's boring..
Bro...methinks that is the definition of FWB...not FB...

There is a fine line between the two...for me...If we are more friends with some sex, then it's FWB...if we're more sex with some friendship, then it's FB...

Agree 100% that it cannot be just sex only...if that's the case, I rather pay for it and not have the emotional aftermath...but with FB, usually we do not share a lot of personal details...just enough to keep conversation going...
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  #87  
Old 28-09-2012, 02:27 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

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Originally Posted by Reoxy View Post
You can try to do them raw and then tell them a week later you have HIV...
that is if you are also courting your own death too loh!! and you just reminded me to stock up my rubber.....LOL
  #88  
Old 28-09-2012, 02:31 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by MitMit View Post
Like to ask gers n guys here a qns.

when a couple is in a FB relationship, why the ger shd feels that she is been use as a sex object? why not the other way round that the guy feels he is being the sex object?
After both are looking for sex isnt it?

Typical i wanna hv my cake n eat it too?........talk abt equality!
The one who's in better control of their feelings wont think that way. Jus rem in the heart, no commitment n feel free to leave if things doesn't work out.

For those too emotional, it's better not to get involved in one. I m someone who's like that, too emotional n tend to put in too much feelings if I really like someone so FB/mind games r not suitable for me . Hence I will auto keep a distance If i sense things r not right, being friends is fine n I will choose to be pure friends anytime over FB. The line will be very clear.

If you r not keen to become one, don't feel awkard to reject for fear of spoiling the friendship, hurt their feelings. Just be upfront and straightforward, make your stand very clear.

Last edited by sane; 28-09-2012 at 02:42 PM.
  #89  
Old 28-09-2012, 02:46 PM
BiGBadw00f BiGBadw00f is offline
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by kengohchien View Post
The past months have been fun. We went on a holiday together, 5 days in HK.

Today we had sex in his house since his wife is overseas. my period's a bit late, but i tested negative on a pregnancy test kit. He was saying casually that i should just bear him a child, to which i retorted that I would not because he doesn't love me and just treats me like a sex plaything.
He was silent for a while and then kissed me and said I'm not only beautiful but smart.

I'm hurting right now. I know it's my fault for not ending it. each time i think i can just treat it as just another fuck. but after sex, the intimacy just makes me feel so safe and secure and warm. and it's the kind of feeling that i feel i don't deserve because i think i'm just a lousy person.

I've found a new job. I'm just waiting for my medical to be cleared and then i can tender. i don't think i'll tell him where i'm going.

and yes, he is my superior. my boss' boss' boss to be exact.
am a tangled web of emotions right now.

Like what I've said before in a previous post.

He maybe ur superior superior boss. But heck, from the way he says as 'should just bear him a child', tells a lot about things he says without going thru his brain. Only shows how insensitive he is.

Be it fb or fwb, the definition is all the same. It's just sex. But that doesn't mean any one or any side of the party should be treated like meat

He feel warm and secure because u feel void and empty u need a right person to fill up that void. And one who would b there selflessly. Not one who would just provide monetary support and just sex. He may claim that he loves you. But seriously. It's just for the sex. Sadly. U are his other alternative.

Don't ever allow urself to be an option. Even if ur just a Fb. Even in such Fb or fwb arrangements. There has to be some mutual understanding.

Another point here lady, u need to be more confident of urself too. No one is undeserving of love. Its just that the time and the right person ain't here yet. (:
  #90  
Old 28-09-2012, 02:56 PM
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Re: how to make my FB fall for me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wizrd View Post
Yes true...but for FB...the feeling is not (or should not be) the...ohhh, I want to share my life with this person, build a home, get a pet, grow a garden, paint a fence and raise children type of feeling...

It is more of a....ohhhh this person is so hot, makes me feel so sexy, gives me so much pleasure that I so love to smell, taste, feel, hold this person and make love till I cannot make love any more type of feeling...

Still feelings but not exactly the same compartment...
I agree... But I always find it hard to not develop feelings after spending time together. I mean, firstly you have to be attracted to/like a person enough to want to sleep with him/her. To me, it's a fine line between the sexual attraction and emotional (?) attraction...

And how is it possible to not fall for someone after making love with him, and then cuddling up to him and falling asleep in his arms? How is it possible to not develop feelings after behaving every bit like a couple except that there has to be no commitment/strings attached between the both of you?

Ok, I think this shows that I am not suited to be in a FB/FWB relationship.
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